My new roommate is turning out to be annoying in precisely the kind of way that makes me certain of one thing- that he has the potential to be the little brother figure I literally never, ever wanted- and apprehensive of another:
That he’s going to be the kiind of kid who feels the need to one-up everything I say, which is the most annoying thing when you happen to be someone who’s Seen Some Shit but is still cognizant of how fortunate you are in spite of it all.
I really hope this doesn’t turn into me eventually snarling about how this isn’t a goddamn misery and insanity pissing contest while he takes that as an admission of defeat rather than the truth it is, because that’s what that shit always ends up being, really.
Get peace-offering trashed with him, bond a little, and then drop some drunken harsh truths on him. He’ll remember them fondly in comparison to all the hangover barfing he has to deal with the next day. Problem possibly solved???